• 1 Post
  • 21 Comments
Joined 1 year ago
cake
Cake day: July 28th, 2023

help-circle


  • It varies depending on the drugs used, I’ve been under multiple times now, the big one being for an open heart bypass.

    That one I saw nothing, felt nothing, but coming out of it I remember them pulling out the breathing tube and putting me on a bi-pap machine. I had to beg to be taken off of it because it was stopping me from exhaling. I could breathe in fine, but the back pressure wouldn’t let me breathe out.

    Then the drugs, it was a combination of a bunch of things, propofol (the stuff that killed Michael Jackson), fentanyl (the stuff that killed Prince). Oxy, the works.

    I was having weird hallucinations. If I closed my eyes, I could see a perfectly painted brick wall about a foot in front of my face. I could see the detail on the bricks and the mortar, the texture of the paint. Bonus - every time they put me in a different room, the wall would change color.
















  • Let me try to change your mind…

    Take 2 pounds of cream cheese, float the foil packs in warm water for 10-15 min. Drop the cheese into a bowl with 1.5 cups of sugar and hit it with a mixer until it’s nice and smooth.

    Add 3/4 cup Dutch processed cocoa powder. Dutch processing reduces the acidity and makes it darker and smoother.

    5 eggs, 2 tablespoons of vanilla, then the secret ingredients, 1/4 cup of Grand Marnier and 2 teaspoons of orange extract.

    Mix all that up until it’s smooth again, then add an entire 10 oz. bag of miniature chocolate chips. Important you use mini chips because full size chips won’t melt all the way and leave a weird texture.

    Now, prep the pan, take a 9" springform pan and spray it with non-stick spray. Pop in 1/4 cup MORE Dutch processed cocoa powder and swirl it all around so it coats all the surfaces. This is going to bake into a dark chocolate crust.

    Pour in the batter and bake at 200°F for EIGHT HOURS. I put it in the oven, go to bed and set an alarm. In the morning, your whole house will smell like chocolate and oranges.

    Now, the worst part, it has to chill. You can’t just eat it, it’s pudding right now. So step 1, let it sit on a wire rack until it’s room temp. 2 to 4 hours.

    Put a plate on top, flip it over, and remove the springform pan. Put the cake in the refrigerator and chill another 2 to 4 hours.

    When the cake is chilled, put another plate on top, flip it right side up, decorate, slice, and serve. I like topping it with some little candied oranges.