You’re such a tease.

That’s no place for a semicolon.

How’s that cock taste?

That makes total sense. My buddy had an outdoor cat about the same age as my indoor cat and that little shit died years ago and my guy is going strong at 16. Also my buddy’s cat used to just massacre rabbits.

Why, exactly? I’m not trying to instigate anything, just genuinely curious.

Wake up, people. Whisker fatigue is REAL.

My yo-yo string just broke when my wife told me she wanted a divorce. The “ah fuckit” is already strong in me. And I’ll be 40 in 6 years.

It’s a delicate balance. Swing too far in the other direction and you end up like me, believing you are inferior to everyone.

Free at last, free at last!

Fuck yeah, squat the world.

No.

Get your shovels, boys. We got another grave to dig.

If I pray real hard will Duke Energy turn my fucking power back on?

This doesn’t seem like the work of demons to me. Seems pretty on brand for your christian god, though.

He uses warming to hinder cooling.

Well, if it’s on wikipedia it must be true.

Lmao who the fuck told you that?

This is a caricature of American cuisine, eaten by literally no one except the hypothetical American that lives in your imagination. Beans on toast actually exists in point of fact reality, and you weird fuckers eat it for all three meals.

Wash your ass better.

Do you not wash your ass?