If you just wait long enough those fish turn into mammals and go back in the water on their own.

I would like a traditional burial but I want to be shot from a human canon into the grave. I wish you luck in your endeavors.

Not collecting stamps, I like that.

Atheism is a belief. Just sayin.

I am still in the habit of turning my wheels in when I park on a hill.

Yes, and horse racing is called “fast glue.” I’d post the old 4chan pic of them all but some are kinda offensive.

Been using Quboz for a few years now, I really like it.

I occasionally harness fire. Does that count?

I can’t believe he’s back after he had sex with that pig on live TV.

If you call them “idiot” you have a 50/50 chance of being right.

Took longer than I thought it would.

I’m surprised they haven’t used phosphorus on Gaza yet.

The closest thing I have to a retirement account is my full keif tray.

Does anyone remember a SNL parody of this commercial? I remember them using the same ELO song but can’t remember anything else about it.