When I was about 13 I got into a deep-feelings conversation with my mom and then she started talking about how hard it was having enormous breasts and I after that I just stopped speaking to everyone.

Slave owners sure were an uppity bunch weren’t they?

The King of England narrowly escaped from what I remember…

I have a home safe that doesn’t lock properly. To replace it would cost me everything that I’d put in a home safe.

Shitty five dollar frozen pizzas are better than so-called “gourmet” pizzas.

Scientist: “We’ve achieved several seconds of a controlled fusion reaction with a very modest net energy gain, which will help us to fine-tune future reactor designs.

News: WORLD’S ENERGY PROBLEMS SOLVED FOREVER

Don’t forget lube. Might have some at checkout. They get it.

I feel like this was a lot more common ten or fifteen years ago, at least around here. Anymore most of the car stickers I see are either some political shit or about their dogs.

I wish you and your teachers the best of luck in your musical studies.

Yeah.

Anything by Douglas Adams, Kerouac, Ferlinghetti, music history textbooks, Samurai Jack slash fiction, public restroom graffiti, HVAC technical manuals, and the comment sections on porn sites.

I don’t refer to 4/4 at all.

I refer first to the whole note, existing independently of any time signature. In fact, you don’t even have to assign a rhythmic value to it for now; the purpose of this exercise is to learn why the rhythmic names of the notes are what they are.

Next, envision the half note. So named because they are exactly half the value of the whole note. Two half notes = one whole note. With me so far?

Next, we move to the note in question - the quarter note. So named because it takes four of them to equal the rhythmic value of the whole note.

Now this is important: You originally called it the “fourth note.” So take note: do not confuse the word “fourth” here to mean “fourth in a series,” or “the fourth beat of the measure,” because that’s not the correct application of the word. “Fourth” in this context is synonymous with “quarter.” So a “fourth note” as you call it is so named because it’s one-fourth (¼) the value of the whole note.

This is about as EILI5 as I can make this.

🦡 🦡🦡🦡🦡🦡🦡🦡🦡🦡🦡🦡🍄🍄

I had the idea that a way to solve this would be to create a symbol that means, “play this note for the entire duration of the measure, regardless of meter.” As far as I know such a symbol doesn’t exist in standard notation.

The term “quarter note” or “fourth note” applies to the note because there are four of them in a whole note. In other words, the names of the notes apply to their subdivisions respective to each other, not the time signature.

Mayonnaise was gone before I even had time to react!

I was the victim of a drive-by ketchupping.

Deer hate you and are trying to kill you.

I am waiting for Country to finally throw off this hick ass pseudo-nationalistic redneck caricature bullshit clown suit and get back to its roots as a genre that tells hard stories about real life.

Cat: “You serve me. Do I make myself clear?”